The names of the contestants for this year's American Princess, presented by the execrable Paul Burrell, are like poetry! I'd love for you to try and guess the made-up one, but unfortunately, they're all real! Clarissa Santiago, an outgoing former beauty pageant contestant from Bronx, NY; Tara Zynel, an opera singer and introverted arts student from Pittsburgh, PA; Liz Rizza, a rapping college basketball player from Umpqua Valley, OR; Cassie Shea Watson, a theater major from Longview, TX; ; Letosha Joshua, a former military sergeant from Chief City, FL; Danielle Sutterfield, a tree-hugging figure model from Arlington, TX; Crystal Rowe, a nanny and former foster child from Folsom, CA; Jasmine Espinal, a punk rocker from Orlando, FL; Kirsten Stiff (pictured), an energetic teacher who makes dog tutus in her spare time, from Sarasota, FL; Felicia Flick, a bikini-wearing boxer from Homer City, PA; Yvonka DeRidder, a bi-sexual Psychology student from Tampa, FL; Nakia Vestal, a fo...